Finding Myself In The Darkness ….

I daydream….

I laugh…

I love….

I play….

I discover….

I embrace….

I escape….

I write….

I kiss….

I reminisce….

I wish….

I create….

I teach….

I design….

I photograph….

I drive….

I dance…

I cook….

I shoot….

I paint….

I read….

I wonder….

I feel….

I plan….

I seek….

I find….

I learn….

I listen….

I adore….

I believe….

I cherish….

I pray….

 

The beauty is no one can take any of that away from me and it makes me feel like a fluttering butterfly …. refusing to stay imprisoned by extreme grief. And the best is only yet to come ….❤

 

 

 

 

How I Survive It …. Part II

lisey2 (2)

 

 

 

 

 

There is nothing quite like the rush I get from shooting guns.

I absolutely love them.

On this particular day, my cousin and I went out to play with ” the bangers.”

I wanted to shoot this gun so badly that I was literally standing on my tippy-toes to do it.

Thank goodness for small pleasures ….

 

Did You Know That Dreams Come True?….

If you pray long enough ….

If you love deep enough ….

If you want it bad enough ….

If you stand firm enough ….

If you wish hard enough ….

If you push through the fear enough ….

Dreams really can and do come true.

 

 

Written by: Judith Land – (Thankfully)

“Empathy is heartbreaking for the virtuous adoptive parent who has given all the love and care and hugs they can to a child that continues to struggle with anger management issues.” Judith Land Every adopted child has feelings they can’t fully comprehend, including grief, denial, abandonment, low self-esteem and anger. There are a thousand reasons why […]

via “Adoption—A thousand reasons to be angry” — Adoption Detective | A True Story by Judith Land

Another 2:11am Catch Up..

I miss you so much it hurts. I can’t put into words what I would give to hold you, to see you play, to see your pretty eyes. The love of an auntie is something so special, and when I think of what has been taken from us having an auntie-first niece relationship it makes me cry. And cry. And cry. I’m so lost without you, I’m amazed I’m able to even function. And to think my baby sister, your mom, feels my pain times a million, is too much for my heart to even handle. When I think of what this has done to her, I can’t even breathe. If I could give my life to take her pain, I would in a moment without question. We pray for you every day, we celebrate your birthday every year, we talk about you and all our dreams coming true when you come home, your pictures are all around the house, my car, and my desk…You are so loved and I want you to know that all of our hearts belong to you, our sweet babygirl….