but she will .

My baby (my niece) doesn’t know  her mommy.

She doesn’t know I’m her auntie.

She doesn’t know how private I like my life to be, now so vulnerable and suspicious of intention.

She doesn’t know how this has changed us.

She doesn’t know how very few people are intimately in my life, selected by decades of proven loyalty, and only her space remains.

She doesn’t know that I ache for her, weep for her, breathe for her.

She doesn’t know how tirelessly we have all tried, helplessly waiting, literally counting the days, the years, the months, the madness.

She doesn’t know that she is the missing jewel in our family crown.

She doesn’t know that she is looking into the faces of strangers, her life a mere  illusion those strangers created.

She doesn’t know how one day, everything in her life is going to change in an instant.

She doesn’t know we will catch her when she falls.

She doesn’t know that we would each give our lives to save hers.

She doesn’t know she is the keeper of so many hopes and dreams.

But she will.

And isn’t the very thought so heavenly …….

 

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