Archive | February 2016

In My Heaven ….

In my heaven …. there will be no broken hearts .

In my heaven …. a lover’s embrace is forever unbroken .

In my heaven …. no child shall weep, be hurt, nor go hungry .

In my heaven …. a friend is there to stay.

In my heaven …. no baby will be taken from their mommy’s arms or wombs .

In my heaven …. beauty is recognized in every part of all things .

In my heaven …. darkness will only describe the calming shade .

In my heaven …. touch heals all wounds .

In my heaven …. we all return to a time of innocence .

In my heaven …. my family is complete .

In my heaven …. the ache will be no more .

In my heaven …. there will my niece be also ….



The Every Day Valentine

Any one who knows me will tell you that I adore those I love. 

I am a natural caretaker, I do things with tender care, and I dote on those who make up my heart’s tapestry.

I’m known for surprises all year round, not just specified calendar dates.

I usually make cards, leave love notes, write inscriptions in books I gift, everything is done with a personal touch.

One of the things I’m famous for is my Valentine’s Day surprise. Whether it’s a candlelit picnic under the moonlight by the lake complete with strawberries and whip cream on a beautiful blanket with tons of throw pillows and sparkling cider, or a night at a charming, off-the-map bed and breakfast, I always go over the top. As the years go by, it seems like I go bigger and bigger and I couldn’t love it more. It brings me joy to pour my love on the ones who hold the keys to my heart.

Although I celebrate Valentine’s Day, it really is just another day. By the time the rest of the year goes by, I’ll have done at least 25 more things to take my lover by surprise. I have always said that in love, Valentine’s Day should be every day, not just one calendar day a year besides your anniversary that you go out of your way to keep your loverboy/lovergirl falling in love with you.

Since everyone knows I do a big production, it wasn’t at all shocking to me that quite a few people asked me ‘ so what do you have planned this year .’ When I spilled the details, the usual reaction of oohs and ahhs made me blush. But it’s nothing like what I have planned for the weekend of the first day of Spring…. The discussion that followed was how much I love to do things that keep life not just rolling along but making memories that make the world disappear. I do things that people have never even thought of doing. ( I consider it a gift. ) Several of the girls said they would have to start stealing some of my ideas and they never thought of Valentine’s Day being every day. Why do you have to wait for one day in February to let someone you love know how much you really love and care about them? Why can’t Valentine’s Day be next Monday night?…. Or all next week?….

I’ve been given some really cute nicknames in my life, but I do have to say that when I was addressed as ‘ the every day Valentine,’ it touched my heart in a beautiful way. It made me feel good that I was seen for the lover-at-heart and hopeless romantic I really am.

I love hard and deep at all times, giving a rush and getting butterflies, that love becomes an energy all its own. Even after all this pain and heartbreak, I am still a master lover, and I’m grateful for that. This hasn’t taken my dreams of love or my talent for the unique and mysterious.

It hasn’t taken my ‘ lets fall, and fall, and fall in love ‘ outlook. I consider that a miracle. It proves that love can overcome all things, any obstacle ….. It feels good, it stays with you, it renews you …. It keeps you going, even when you don’t want to. When things get to be impossible and the weight of the world is crushing down on you, it helps you float away above the clouds, into a place where nothing can take away from its sweetness. It’s like paradise, you get lost in the pleasure zone….

Love needs to be watered in order to flourish. It needs a caring hand, gentle touch, rough and tumble play …. Love is everything, every minute, every day …. Passion, love, excitement …. Surprises, kisses, heart-to-heart hugs, playful gestures of endearment by day, cuddlebugs by night, love is so important. It heals the aching heart, a lover’s touch can make all the pain go away, even if for a moment.

Love…. live by it …. Every day, not just one day….



~ The Every Day Valentine











A Family ….

A family loves …. by care and embrace ….

A family endures …. by hope and strength ….

A family forgives …. by heart and humility ….

A family waits …. by courage and faith ….

A family compromises …. by patience and understanding ….

A family overcomes …. by unity and prowess ….

A family survives …. by prayer and protection ….

A family fulfills …. by laughter and loyalty ….

A family heals …. by cuddles and kisses ….

A family stands …. by design and dreams ….


A Moral Absolute.

So many things happen to one in one’s lifetime.

Memories cherished, mistakes made, lessons learned, goals accomplished, milestones reached …. changes, loving, learning, growing …. It’s life, and it is made up of a million decisions.

There are some things that happen that are forgivable.

This situation with my niece, my neighbor, and this conniving couple is definitely not one of them.

There is no explanation that would ever make sense, no apology that would ever suffice. 

There are certain things in life that you just don’t do.

They are moral absolutes.

This is one of them.

You don’t sell your neighbor’s baby off, especially for profit of any kind; is she insane or just inhuman?

You don’t use your own infertility as an excuse to take advantage of a scared, young, and vulnerable girl. You back her into a decision that you knew full well she should not be making on her own, knowing she wasn’t capable enough to make such a decision. ( But more than capable with family support, as we all are in any given situation ).

You don’t sneak an adoption past a family that would have held on to their baby with both hands, ( which they all knew ) had they just been told. You met purposely in secret. You planned your happiness in the face of another’s demise and duress …. Tsk … Tsk … Tsk … Shame on you, shame on you, shame on you. One day, you will look into the face of that child and explain why you did this in such a brutal fashion. Why you made sure you twisted the knife that you helped stick in our backs.

Serious allegations, backed by paperwork that has yet to come to light.

The clock ticking ever so slowly, but it is ticking. It feels like a bomb with a very long fuse.

I don’t get how such a small group of people could have left this disaster behind them and not even blink an eye. It’s appalling and it makes me so angry. It hurts more than anything I have ever been through, any of us have been through, or will ever go through.

Nothing could ever make this right.

Nothing would make it fair.

It was wrong in every way.