Archive | November 2016

Even When I Close My Eyes

It always hurts.

That monster of emotion always ready to devour …. can’t ever get away from it.

It finds you in the abyss, even when you’re lost yourself.

It sucks the life out of you ever-so-slowly.

It takes the energy from you, draining your life’s blood.

It is madness; manifested from mind to real life.

An ocean of distance isn’t enough.

Even when I close my eyes and try to escape it, the darkness of it all clouds my memory. In my mind it almost looks like Polaroid’s being taken too quickly and being thrown to the floor. They come too fast to catch and handle. They land on top of each other, distorted.

Everything is upside down.

This rocked our entire universe and drives me within an inch of the edge more often than I could ever admit. I can’t count how many times I have said, “I just can’t do this anymore.”

Nobody really understands.

Nobody really knows what this feels like.

Nobody knows what it feels like to be betrayed by neighbors/friends, and stabbed in the back by childless strangers.

Nobody but us.

Now the question is, when will my niece know?…..